If a picture Paints a Thousand Words

My week long vacation is winding it's way down. Normally this is the week I always rent a beach house in Long Beach Island. For the first time in years I didn't rent a place. I don't know how the summer flew past me so quickly. Now that I have had time to sit back and actually begin to breathe again I can see I stopped breathing the moment Prick got out of jail. I think in the back of my mind I knew that it would be the same this summer as it was the past two. Police reports and court dates. Now that the week is coming to a close I can reflect that this was probably the best thing to do. I spent the week cleaning out my closets, riding Veritas, writing and I even read three books in a row. I also started to transfer old blogs that I have written in other sites over to here. I saw friends just about every day. My fear of continually spiraling in to a depression if I am not working 7 days a week have proven to be wrong. I can honestly say I have not thought much about the past two years or the upcoming court date next week. I found some semblence of my old self coming back and it's been a really long time since I felt that for more than a few fleeting moments. The fact that I could extend it to almost an entire week seems like a fucking miracle.

One of the days was too humid and hot to ride. My boss was at the Jersey shore already and called to tell me that there was only a land breeze and a million green head flies. I decided instead of heading to the shore for the day, I would head up to the mountains. I forgot my camera's battery. The whole reason to head up there was to take photos. I hiked up to a peak and just sat. Before I knew it, two hours had passed before a voice startled me back in to the present. A group of photographers were setting up their cameras for the late afternoon and early dusk. One of the photographers had approached me to tell me he took a photo of me sitting there. He thought I looked peaceful. I had an internal giggle on that. God, if he only knew how long it has been since that look has been on my face. He asked if he could send me a copy? and I told him no thanks. I don't need to see it. I feel it with my heart.

Comments

SweetPeaSurry said…
It certainly sounds as though you've had a lovely vacation. Good luck on the court date. I hope with all sincerity that all goes well.

all my best and brightest blessings!
August 10, 2009 at 5:02 PM
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